Afraid There’s Something Wrong With Your Kid? START HERE.Jan 10, 2022
Most of us at some point are going to wonder:
Is there something really wrong with my kid?
Why are they behaving like that? Do we need to go to counseling?
And the big doozy…..IS IT MY FAULT??
Especially with my first (and most challenging in the younger years) kid, I worried about that a LOT. I also had very little knowledge of human development and how to discern what was normal and what might need more specialized attention.
Even before I saw them listed in the syllabus of my Master’s level human development course, a friend told me about these trusty old childhood development books. They were a beacon of reason and hope for me.
Did you know that it’s totally normal for your toddler to not obey your verbal commands? And to say “No!” allllll the time?
Did you know that it’s totally normal for a 2 year old to be unable to share? And at 2 ½ to be rigid, inflexible and subject to violent emotions?
Did you know that it’s pretty normal for 3 year olds to say “I hate you!” when they’re frustrated by limits?
Or that 6 year olds often fall out of their chairs at dinner? And find it completely devastating to lose a game?
7 year olds are often moody and sulky.
8 year olds are typically expansive and high energy and daydreamy.
It goes on and on.
Soooo many times I’d be worried about a behavior until I picked up the book. It would be right there, staring me in the face. THIS IS NORMAL. It's "developmentally appropriate."
You still have to figure out how you want to parent, guide and disciple them through these stages. They need your firm but gentle authority.
But you can stop worrying that your child is uniquely “defiant” or “willful” or “wild.”
Too busy to read a book? START HERE with the cheat sheet. Then if you’re really struggling with a particular age, buy the book (there are often used copies for cheap at thrift stores and on Amazon), read these chapters: Characteristics, Techniques, Stories from Real Life. Then skim anything else that piques your interest.
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